Poetri

I convert what I see into feeling
My feelings guide my will
My will depends on my eyes
I am still a child

Life feeds my dreams
Provides the vocabulary for my fantasies
Impotence inspires perversion
Those who cannot kill commit suicide

I see my cat breathing, asleep
And am reminded of a dead animal in the street
Cats eat, sleep, play, and hunt
What do we work for?

Light fades, I sleep
Today becomes yesterday
Soon the details of yesterday are forgotten
What is today for?

I fly in my dreams and reluctantly rise from my bed
The world pushes and pulls me like the moon
I am an ocean of white sheets
As moody and as deep as the darkness of my imagination

I go outside for air
And stand in the courtyard, in the cold, in the sun
Wrap myself inside my own mind
And scream the songs of the universe silently

Spoiled with food, sex and entertainment
Under their influence I am nothing more than a bag of shit
Only when I am alone, hungry and cold, do I begin to know myself
Far away from other words, thoughts, and perspectives

I do not question music, I just listen and move
Without its rhythm I am alone and hungry
And out of this pain I move, and create, and eat
This is the only time I savor anything

The human voice is warm like a candle
When I am alone, I am drawn to it
Drawn in to others and away from myself
That is when I become enslaved

Their light is blinding and time – pressure binding my mind
I stare blankly at the world I have bathed in their light
My own light behind me
Forgotten like yesterday